Monday, November 7, 2011

pleasure does not mean happiness

"Although there are no easy solutions to avoiding these destructive pleasures, fortunately we have a place to begin: the simple reminder that what we are seeking in life is happiness. As the Dali Lama points out, that is an unmistakable fact. If we approach out choices in life keeping that in mind, it is easier to give up the things that are ultimately harmful to us, even if those things being us momentary pleasure. The reason why it is unusually difficult to "Just say no!" is found in the word "no"; that approach is associated with a sense of rejecting something, of giving up something, of denying ourselves.

But there is a better approach: framing any decision we face by asking ourselves, :Will it bring me happiness?" That simple question can be a powerful tool in helping us skillfully conduct all areas of our lives, not just in the decision whether to indulge in drugs or that third piece of banana cream pie. It puts a new slant on things. Approaching our daily decisions and choices with this question in mine shifts the focus from what we are denying ourselves to what we are seeking - ultimate happiness. A kind of happiness, as defined by the Dali Lama, that is stable and persistent. A state of happiness that remains, despite life's ups and downs and normal fluctuations of mood, as part of the very matrix of our being.  With this perspective, it's easier to make the "right decision" because we are acting to give ourselves something, not denying or withholding something from ourselves - an attitude of moving toward rather that moving away, an attitude of embracing life rather than rejecting it. This underlying sense of moving toward happiness can have a very profound effect; it makes us more receptive, more open, to the joy of living" - from The Art of Happiness

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